The dance was ermm.... not the bast dance i ever went to. I danced with Xa though.. good to know I have at least one good friend!
I can only take soo much of snyder.. he's really an attention whore, i thought he would never leave, but thank god, he left early!
Which brings me to Shaun.. >,< he left really early.. I'm afraid I hurt him. goddamnit.. i do this to every guy I meet.. I wish I could be more warm and loving but i gotta hurt the ones I love cause I'm a crazy whorebitch from hell.
I was thinkin last night "Naya, why do you hurt people?"reasons: 1) I don't want to be stepped on or dominated 2) I'm a coward
3)I'm selfish 4) I'm corrupted 6) I'm concieted 7) I'm apathetic....need I say more? I had a really good reason last night why I hurt people but I forgot it >,As I stood against the wall I watched everyone dance their pathetic dances and I wondered why? Why do we just go to these stupid functions. Everyone would be much better without it. I think that because it is the no.1 break up spot. I wonder if anyone would ever break up if it weren't for dances. Perhaps it is because everyone goes there to show off their skills to all of your friends and also to be close to people that they don't always associate with. I usually go to the dances thinking that I might dance with someone. It happens only rarely (see "reasons why i hurt people #s 1-2 and 4). I just want to feel.. accepted maybe appreciated... maybe loved.
I guess I see dances as a battle of being accepted or not. As you may see I'm not usually accepted by anyone. now im just rambling
what I'm trying to say is I'll never really be accepted and I'll never accept anyone. I'm just a lonely, desperate loser.
I think I'll join a nunnery and become a nun. Then I could leave my crusty life without the pleasure of having people spit on my grave =)
I'll do good work for the world and I'll never feel lonely cause I'll be married to God! I'll learn to appreciate life by reading the bible and rejoycing in what God has created =)!!! Or... I'll just move on an live like a normal person..except without any friends but my cats, which I will feed only 1 a week and I'll never clean out their cat boxes. You know, I'll be one of those crazy cat ladies..
or maybe I'll just be me, a hollow, selfish, ghost in a shitty human shell.. I'm sorry I hurt you =(